For some reason, I had the temptation to do some UberEats runs for a few hours today but I need to slow down. Really. My time is being driven by essentially collecting someone else’s dollar and I really need to actually take time to recalibrate my plans for the remainder of the year and get a jump start on next year. It just gets hard not to prioritize the moneymaking since I’m not trying to monetize my creative endeavors just yet; a negress needs a solid fanbase and consistent content. It’s just that whole thing with adulting: I’m just doing the Uber hustle to cushion my savings accounts for other bills so that I can sleep easier at night.
But anyway. As I was making my Wal-Mart run this morning in order to pick up pens and pencils for a planning session today (this turned into buying a Patti pie, cereal, and new toothbrushes), I decided to let the vibrations and emotion of Thundercat guide my thoughts. What conclusions did I come to as far as projects?
Slow the fuck down, Alaina.
That was the major conclusion. I really want to churn out something major on a monthly basis, but that shit is getting scattered as all hell. Training the mind is such a masterful endeavor, but once you master the mind, you can master anything--THEM FUNDAMENTALS, MY NIGGAS AND NEGRESSES (and others)!!
Getting off track. I’m slowing the fuck down with projects I’ve announced and shit but this far, I have more in store for “Into the Lainaverse, Vol. 1” before I move onto the second volume; there’s the art lady zine that I want to produce; there’s also Project Orange 91’s pre-production process and how to make available content; and then there’s the porn coloring book that’s been eating at me and maybe even a handlettering apparel line that has been in my spirit.
The reality is that these are all major endeavors...and my little Black ass thinks I can pull off the grand slam of them in 30 days or less. (To self) Bitch, bye. There’s that whole saying about how to eat an elephant (why would heathens do this?) and making the small steps, the baby steps is so weird for me since it means I have to rewire my brain from making excuses. I feel like my mind is used to coming up with these grand schemes and sharing them and getting all hype and then cowering into a state of silence and paralysis once understanding that these schemes require that I do something.
And so I shall do. But before I can do, I have to dump all this shit out of my head. This doesn’t work for everybody, I’m sure--some of y’all may stay trapped in the planning stage, afraid to take initiative. My mind runs at a thousand miles per hour and I lose track of shit REALLY QUICK if I don’t have a list and break down everything to the most minute details: for those who came to my apartment, I literally had to make a list everyday of how I was going to arrange, unpack and clean. IT’S MY NINJA WAY.
Anyway. Time to do the deed before Discount Chris Evans gets here with his fine ass so we can watch Stranger Things (yea, I’m late as fuck).
I wanna love y’all, but nah. Not yet. Thanks for reading though!